Ex-Girlfriend Blackens Every Day: Chapter 70
ARC 5: SPLIT PERSONALITY'S EX-GIRLFRIEND (3)
Physical weakness and shortness of breath; how pitiful.
His affiliates came in droves to offer gifts and well wishes, saying—
"City Lord, please take good care of your body!"
"City Lord, do not give up on treatment!"
"City Lord, I know a physician..."
A certain someone finally lost his temper and exploded.
He is very healthy!!! Well wishes are unnecessary!!!
When Linlang was sighted bringing medicine, they all flocked to her to resume their chatterings.
"Furen, you must persuade the city lord. To collapse at such a young age!"
"Now, if only the city lord could join me in practicing vitality exercises, he is sure to recover quickly! There is no doubt he will be sprightly once again!"
"Furen, have a look at this. I—"Please read this at onemachineshow.blogspot.com
Before the words were finished, she disappeared in a gust of wind.
Linlang was carried back to her room by a furious city lord.
Are martial artists this incredible?
Linlang placed the tisane down and walked over to the copper mirror to fix her skewed hair ornament.
The head can be cracked, the blood can pour, but the hairstyle can never be messy!
"If they come again in the future, don't pay them any heed," said the city lord in a cold voice.
Men are like mountain flowers. They may flutter in the wind but are otherwise inviolable.
"Ah, is Fujun angry? They must have good intentions to worry over Fujun's body."
Linlang cast a side glance.
The man was like a cat who had his tail stepped on. "Worry? I'm in perfect health!" He all but roared.
"Oh," Linlang responded with a charming smile. "Indeed, Fujun is naturally a powerful man who can hold back all enemies."
Not knowing why, he actually understood the meaning in her eyes.
Irony.
Once again, the city lord was shamed into a fury.
Does this little wife know what she's insinuating? How can she mock her own husband?
I must tell you, such impertinence will court your disaster.
It was time to restore is prestige as the husband!
"You, come here!" he said harshly.
"No. You ruffled my hair. I don't wish to see you right now."
As Linlang said this, there was a seductive air to how she fixed up her hair.
A wooden comb clattered to the ground.
Linlang was easily carried on his shoulders by the man.
She couldn't help rolling her eyes.
City Lord, can your kidnapping routine get any worse?
Then...
Slender fingers carefully unfastened the jade pendant on her waist.
Hm, he's trying to figure out how to undo it.
Women's clothing and ornaments were very different from men's wear. Dressing and undressing them can be a complicated affair.
As a result, the puzzled city lord fiddled for a long time.
Linlang simply rested her hands behind her head and watched him struggle.
Her inky black hair scattered over the brocade fabric provided a sharp contrast to her red lips. The deep shade could rile up a person's heart.
Having caught sight of her playful smile, Zhu Wuyang could not remain calm.
He felt that she was looking down on him.
"Do you need my help?" She smiled.
"I. Do. Not."
Can a man bear it?
Of course he can't.
With a palm strike embued with qi, her outerwear was easily disintegrated to reveal the white clothing inside.
Now do you see how good I am?
Zhu Wuyang recalled the secret book Linlang showed him that day. How did he not realize that she was fooling him? He swallowed his pride and asked others for advice.
Just thinking back on that person's teachings, his arm jerked forward.
Linlang was suddenly flipped in the air and landed on his chest. Her nose stung from the impact.
"..."
Is this frog pose for real?
The man wrapped his arms around her and contentedly drifted off to sleep.
He fell asleep.
Asleep.
Just like that.
Linlang was speechless.Please read this at onemachineshow.blogspot.com
Expecting this frog prince to become enlightened is like expecting a rock to jump on its own.
What a waste of flirtatious glances.
She stretched out her long leg and ruthlessly kicked him.
Bang——
The slumbering man tumbled off the bed like a snowball.
What in the devil!
Is it an earthquake?
And his wife? He has to lead her out!
Linlang immediately pretended to be sleep.
Zhu Wuyang rubbed his head. Could he still be asleep? Why would he fall off the bed? He doesn't recall having such bad sleeping habits.
Looking up, he saw her sleeping peacefully in the posture of a timeless fairy.
The thought that they were to spend the rest of their lives together made Zhu Quyang's heart feel sweet, and he couldn't help but blush. He didn't care about anything else.
He lay down again, spread out the blanket, then covered the both of them.
His bedmate seemed to mumble something. She turned to the side and extended a leg out.
Zhu Wuyang: "..."
How in the world did she manage to slump her leg over his neck? He is not a lantern!
"It's not good to sleep this way." He assumed she was still dreaming. Shaking his head, he patiently corrected her posture with a smile on his face.
Once she was back in her original position, he prepared to close his eyes.
Pa——
Unexpectedly, the blanket smothered his face.
Zhu Wuyang was like a worried old hen. He did not get angry. Instead, he pulled the blanket and conscientiously covered the person next to him.
For half the night, this great aunt tossed him back and forth.
He gathered her in his arms as he thought to himself in a daze, he must visit the temple one of these days and pay respects to the god of longevity. He doesn't want to die so young.
Despite everything, this night turned out to be the most peaceful slumber he ever experienced.
Zhu Wuyang was awakened by a burst of pain.
"What are you doing?"
He asked the culprit with a dark face.
"Fujun, seeing how red and tender your cheeks were, Qie Shen's hands felt an itch. There was a sudden urge to pinch and see what ripe produce could be plucked out."
"..."
To say such nonsense with an earnest face!
Does she take him for a child?!
He patted her face and said menacingly, "Make trouble one more time and I will throw you out!"
Linlang immediately felt wronged, and her eyes began to water. "Are, are you so cruel? I am your wife...am I not even allowed to touch your face? *Sniff* I can't live anymore. Go ahead and kill me."
"..."
He said uttered those words thinking.
"Fine, what were you trying to do?"
He quickly pulled her back into his embrace. His low voice, which resembled a spring breeze blowing over a mountainside, was soft and hazy as he coaxed her. "Then is it fine if I don't throw you away? Must you be such a little ancestor so early in the morning? Stop making trouble."
"This is too much. You—you actually said I'm making trouble? That I'm unreasonable? Oh, how can I go on? Don't stop me, I must go hang myself!"
"..."
When did he say she was unreasonable?
Zhu Wuyang's temples were aching.
What kind of fiend did he marry into his home? This is beginning to scare him, you hear?
The man coaxed her for a long time until she finally calmed down.
He stared at the bed top with a woeful expression.
Linlang tilted her head and moved around energetically.
Watching his expressions change was so funny.
She seemed to think of something. "There is a temple fair tonight. Would you accompany me there?"
Zhu Wuyang shook his head, "Not tonight. I'm meeting A Fu and the rest to negotiate the shops' rental prices for the coming year. I'm afraid I'll be preoccupied late into the night. Why don't I have some guards follow you there? You can go buy as much as you like."
On that unhappy note, she hummed in disappointment.
Zhu Wuyang's voice softened. "Wait until the Qiqiao Festival1. I will accompany you, all right?"
"Then, pinkie swear."
She wagged a finger in front of his face.
The man laughed despite himself. She really can be childish.
No matter, there was no harm in spoiling her.
After all, he was the one who deceived her into marrying him.
Zhu Wuyang's expression was slightly overcast.
At night, Wushuang City at night was livelier than in the daytime. The lights were bright as day, and the streets were crowded with families, from the youngest members to the oldest ones, along with vendors selling candy and acrobatics performing stunts.
As he listened to the laughter from beyond the walls, he was lost in thought.
He imagined what she would look like as she stood in front of the colored lanterns as the wind blowing around her.
She must look beautiful with the blood-red pendant on her forehead.
Having thought this far, Zhu Wuyang's expression turned unsightly.
That person is so beautiful, won't she attract a lot of wolves?
Suddenly, he could picture the scene of a handsome and rich noble offering his courtesy. Linlang doesn't refuse him. Instead, she turns her head towards him with a smiling expression that says, 'Look you didn't accompany me, but someone else was willing."
"That bastard!"Please read this at onemachineshow.blogspot.com
He couldn't help but curse.
Then, the audience fell silent.
The young man who was in the process of making a report was terrified.
Zhu Wuyang: "..."
It's over. There goes his lofty image.
"I need to use the restroom. Consult over this matter more carefully."
He stood up from his desk, shook his clothes, then gracefully walked out of the room.
After looking all around him, the city lord jumped to the top of a tree and surveyed the bustling crowd under the bright lanterns.
He didn't know where she went.
But according to her restless temperament, she was likely to be at the liveliest place in the festival.
Zhu Wuyang pondered for a while before making his way to the center of the temple fair. He leaped onto the roofs and vaulted walls, passing countless people until he nimbly landed on the ground.
Because of the crowded area, he was forced to walk slowly. He couldn't help but feel impatient when he saw the sea of black heads.
He finally squeezed his way to the front.
Amidst the myriad of lights, he saw her at first glance.
She was wearing a thin plum-red cloak, and the sapphire blue dress reminiscent of the morning sky looked beautiful.
He quietly stepped forward.
The guards who noticed him were about to salute, but he stopped them with a raise of his hand.
The oblivious little lady took a copper coin and tossed it over the bridge where it struck the silver goblet below.
Suddenly, a bright smile bloomed on her face.
She quickly folded her hands and muttered a few words under her breath.
"May Father and Mother be in good health, never to grow old in a hundred years."
"May Cousin become a champion in the palace examination and have all his wishes fulfilled."
"May A Hua continue to fatten, never to be ill or disaster-stricken."
"May Da Hua catch soon and give birth to a litter of puppies for me to play with."
Zhu Wuyang's face was ashen.
This A Hua, isn't that the puppy in her household?
How unreasonable for cats and dogs to come before him!
"Um... I feel as if I forgot someone?" She thought hard.
Zhu Wuyang thought, Fortunately, this little rascal had a bit conscience.
"Oh!" She poked her head in sudden realization. "I almost forgot the little turtle!"
Man: "..."
What did he expect?
After chanting her last pet's name, the girl patted her butt and left.
The city lord really couldn't bear it anymore and simply whisked her away.
"Aiyah! Who are you? You scoundrel, unhand—mph!"
He covered her mouth.
Linlang opened her mouth and bit him.
He was not deterred by the pain as he dragged her into a secluded alley.
Only then did he let go. There had long since been a row of red teeth marks on him.
"I tell you, do not act recklessly. My husband will kill you!"
It was because the alley was too dark. She had not yet recognized him and assumed that some daring ruffian had decided to have his way with her.
Zhu Wuyang scoffed. Did this little lady forget to bring her brains with her?
If it wasn't him, why else would the guards let him take her away without a word of protest?
Thinking of her former 'misdeed' against himself, Zhu Wuyang couldn't help but cave into the desire to bully her. He deliberately lowered his voice and spoke in a gruff tone. "Little miss, even if you scream yourself hoarse, there will be no one to save you."
As he said this, he planted a heavy kiss on her forehead.
After that humiliating fainting incident, the city lord has been secretly practicing on steamed buns as a substitute for her lips.
Nevertheless, it was still difficult for him to progress any further than this.
En, let's start with an intimite forehead kiss then gradually ease into it!
As soon as he decided on this, he was immediately brimming with fighting spirit!
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The author has something to say:-
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After a little angel reminded me, I found that there is an auto setting for posting. I feel so stupid for doing it manually...
Now that I'm in bad mood, I'm gonna go abuse the city lord. No one can stop me~~
- Qiqiao Festival (乞巧节—qǐqiǎo jié)a Chinese festival celebrating the annual meeting between the cowherd and weaver girl (a romantic couple from mythology). You can think of it as a Valentine's Day of sorts↩︎
... Now I'm wondering how they even had a child in the previous life.
ReplyDeletePracticing kissing on steamed buns!!!! 🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeletelmao he's so innocent
ReplyDeletethanks for the chapter!